Leitis in Waiting

In the Kingdom of Tonga, there is the cultural tradition of Fakaleitis, “like a lady,” who are transgender women sought after by the church and royalty for their service. Joey Joleen Matele told her story and the story of the leitis of Tonga in a documentary called, “Leitis in Waiting,” about the lives of these transgender activists. Words fail me to capture the effect of having heard her story and her struggle to convince her community that her congenital transgenderness is rooted in the culture of Tonga. 

Her life as a leiti is not an import “from the West,” as the evangelical anti-hero pastor in the film claims. He happens to have a USA-sponsored radio program that spews hate. But unlike a vast majority of us who sit at our armchairs and complain about the right wing, Joey invites the pastor into her movie, into her story, into her life, because she doesn’t want to give up on him and give in to hate.

When you grow up in suburban New Jersey, places like Tonga or Georgia (the country) or Libya or Cote d’Ivoire are not places that you know about, dream of visiting or imagine the people living in. Yet, in my profession, I know these places and the people who live and love like you and me. I have had the privilege of being reminded over and over again in my travels of the utter commonness of our humanity. 

One of the leitis in the film has a stage name of “Lady Gugu,” because she wants to be like Lady Gaga, but also have her own persona. What teenager in suburban New Jersey couldn’t relate to that? Joey, herself, spoke about having a 13 year old who acts like a 20 year old and a 20 year old that acts like a 13 year old. If that’s not a universal parenting observation, I don’t know what is.

Of course, in observing the commonness of our humanity, I do not want to conflate our life experiences. Indeed, the leitis have suffered harassment, violence and even death for their otherness. But it is because of our commonness and our right to all have fundamental freedoms and live in dignity that we must fight for the Leitis of Tonga. As Prime Minister Ardern here in New Zealand has said in her deeply empathetic response to the terrorist attack in Christchurch, “they are us and we are them.”

Joey Joleen Matele ended the screening of her movie with a song. Her gorgeous silky voice sang out, “You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains…” and I floated out of the room bonded to her for life.